Posted in Behind the Scenes, Revenge of the Turd

Turd Feels Like Chopped Beef

“Thanks for talking Mom and Dad into letting me come along, Joe,” said Stanley.
“Anytime! I hate driving alone.”
“Thanks a lot,” grumbled Turd. “What am I chopped beef?”
“No, you’re the guy who keeps sticking his hand through the windshield and raising the wipers!”

Posted in Behind the Scenes, Revenge of the Turd

Pickles Threatens to Kill Stanley

They pushed on both sides of the wall. Several minutes later, Stanley hand went forward. The panel slid back and revealed a small open space, like a box. Stanley screamed like a little girl. Pickles threw her hand over his mouth and threatened to kill him if he didn’t shut up. Piper shined her headlamp inside. A tiny spiders eyes were looking back at her.

Posted in Behind the Scenes, Revenge of the Turd

Stu Meets the Jerk

“NOOOO!!! GO BACK!!! GO BACK!!!” screamed Turd.
Stanley didn’t hesitate. He raced back down and collided into Stu.
“You yelled Turd.”
“Yeah, he’s with us. He went up to see his old room, but your Grandmother just threw him out.”
“Wait! That jerk is in the manor right now?”
“JERK?” yelled Turd. He yanked Stu’s pants down as he ran past with Elena hot on his tail.
Stu looked down at his pants, now lying at his ankles. “Yup! He’s here.”

Posted in Revenge of the Turd

Kicked out of School

“Kicked out! Kicked out!” cried Piper who was as bad as Hermoine Granger when it came to missing school.
“It’s only for a week,” said Pickles feeling quite happy about not having to go.
“Look at the bright side,” chimed in Stanley. “We’ve got a whole week to find a solution to Turd.”
Piper stopped storming around her room. “What can we do? We’ve tried reasoning with him. That didn’t work. Uncle Joe tried talking to him. Mom has threatened to find a way to make him die a second time. What’s left?”

Posted in Behind the Scenes, Characters, Revenge of the Turd

Die again, Turd! Die! – Pickles

Dear Diary (2:30 AM),

Ugh! Turd is driving me insane!!! It’s like 24/7 he has to play the drum. Actually – it’s not playing! It’s more like constant banging, like some sort of cruel Chinese water torture, or a three-year-old with a spoon and a pot! Pretty much the same thing.

I’ve tried everything to block it out. I tried the fan, a spa machine, ear plugs – nothing works! I went into Dad’s bedroom tonight to protest,  and he was fast asleep with a smile on his face – and wearing a NOISE CANCELING HEADSET! JERK!!! I’m the one who has to get up for school in the morning!  grrrrrrrr

If you never hear from me again, Diary, it’s because I threw myself out the window.